Two Arrested Following Midnight Bar Fight; ISIS Claims Responsibility

ST. GEORGE- Two St. George men are in police custody following a dispute at a local bar that turned ugly Saturday night. 

The Islamic State in Iraq (ISIS) immediately claimed responsibility.

Witnesses reported that the two men began arguing loudly sometime around midnight, followed by punches and "one of the men being tossed over the bar." One report also stated one of the men was thrown down the bar and slid down it from end to end, comically smashing other patrons' beer glasses, and then crashing through the wall, "like in all those saloon fights from Western films." 

In the statement that appeared online just hours following the assault, a group claiming to be ISIS condoned the incident and encouraged its followers around the world to commit similar attacks in Western alcohol establishments. "Allah's wrath is kindled against His enemies," it read. "Let those who profess His great name show their loyalty by throwing punches and instigating bar brawls wherever drunken discord can be found. Allahu Akbar!" State officials could not immediately confirm the authenticity of the message.

One man suffered facial lacerations and bruising while the other broke a finger, but otherwise no serious injuries were reported. The two men have been booked into Purgatory Correctional Facility on $1000 bail. The bar's owner stated he would likely press charges due to damage caused to his wall and expensive beer glasses.

Following the attack, U.S. federal authorities warned all bars, beer gardens, pubs, dives, honky tonks, lounges, roadhouses, taverns, drinkeries, and taphouses to be on high alert for more drunken brawls inspired by ISIS's "call to brawl." Authorities also noted that the Islamic State, whose calls to violence in the past two years have led to devastating terror attacks, seems to be shifting its focus to more "domestic" incidents.

ISIS has claimed responsibility for a string of local incidents lately, including a recent hike in city water rates, the malfunctioning city carousel that injured a woman in February, two cases of shoplifting at Target and Family Dollar, a local outbreak of influenza, and in general, any negative thing that has ever happened, to anyone, anywhere, at any given time.