Arachni & Phobia

I am currently in the process of typing up all my journals so they'll be available to me online. The following is an excerpt from my journal in 1998. Basically, I'm not sure what I was smoking in 5th grade, but I had some little bead spiders (named Arachni and Phobia, haha, get it? Pretty clever I was!) that apparently took on some crazy anthropomorphic traits.

[excerpt begins] Arachni and Phobia Information* [note at bottom of page “An explanation is necessary. They are bead spiders.”]


Arachni= is five months old, lived the first two months of his life at Anthony Mathews' house in Ivins. Born in Anthony’s bedroom on April 6, 1998. Was sold to me at 4th grade Mini-Mall. A good companion. Married to Phobia on June 20th.

Phobia= is three months old, has been living at my house all her life. Met Arachni on June 15, got married June 20. Was actually born in Anthony’s bedroom on June 6. Was immediately sent over to my house to mate Arachni. She is pregnant.

(additional information)

For most of the time Arachni and Phobia have been together, they have been almost inseperable. But one night, Arachni went out with a girl named Angela Carson. They went to Chili’s. They were both secretly watched by Phobia from the window. As soon as Arachni came home, Phobia said she hated him, and told him “Let’s get a divorce!” They were planning to, and they almost did, but on another night, when Angela came back over, Phobia killed her. She was executed and put to death on Sept. 15, 1998. Arachni swore he would never do such a thing again. He is now living with me. We both miss Phobia terribly. [excerpt ends]

Not only did this insane story involve adultery, cold blooded arachnicide, and capital spider punishment, but I even took Phobia, put her in a lego box, and then went and buried the box in the desert behind my house, just to make the story that much more real to myself. Many times over the course of the next several years, I went back to the desert and attempted to dig up the box, but I could never find it again. I hope this has been enlightening and helped you to understand why my 5th grade class thought I was such a freak.