Arby's Adventures
So I have finally learned what it's like to be a COMPLETELY different person. Every time I go to Arby's, and they ask me for my name, I tell them something different! I mean...LOLOLOL...how HILARIOUS IS THAT?!?!?! Today, for example, I was Mark. Last time I went, I was Jim. One time I went, I was Barnaby. The Barnaby one was weird, because there was no prior thought process. The guy asked me for my name, and it was the first thing that came to mind. I was thinking that maybe I had the circus on my mind, but I don't think there is a circus with the name "Barnaby." I must've crossed "Barnum" and "Bailey" or something. The Arby's guy didn't seem at all phased by my odd name. What a nice guy, so unwilling to judge my name.
In case you didn't know, I go to Arby's way too much because I am too dang lazy to go to Lin's and pick up 20 boxes of cup noodles for my lunch breaks at work. And I am paranoid about making sandwiches because I hate to leave filthy peanut-buttery knives laying around the sink. "Well why don't you just clean the knife Barnaby?" you might be asking. NO. Besides, a junior chicken sandwich is probably healthier. All that protein. All of those vitamins and minerals swimming around in the Arby's sauce and the horsey sauce. You can't go wrong, especially when the vitamins and minerals are swimming. I don't care that their commercials suck and are the most annoying thing to hit TV in all of my years. I JUST WANT A DANG SANDWICH.
And now, to end this, some memorable dialogue from the blockbuster Cohen brothers' black comedy Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers.
"Most of them have seen too many winters!"-- Gimli
"Or too few."-- Legolas (I almost called him Leonard, I guess I forgot what his name was).
The main characters look at Legolas with concern, as they often do when he adds haunting wisdom.
The end.
In case you didn't know, I go to Arby's way too much because I am too dang lazy to go to Lin's and pick up 20 boxes of cup noodles for my lunch breaks at work. And I am paranoid about making sandwiches because I hate to leave filthy peanut-buttery knives laying around the sink. "Well why don't you just clean the knife Barnaby?" you might be asking. NO. Besides, a junior chicken sandwich is probably healthier. All that protein. All of those vitamins and minerals swimming around in the Arby's sauce and the horsey sauce. You can't go wrong, especially when the vitamins and minerals are swimming. I don't care that their commercials suck and are the most annoying thing to hit TV in all of my years. I JUST WANT A DANG SANDWICH.
And now, to end this, some memorable dialogue from the blockbuster Cohen brothers' black comedy Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers.
"Most of them have seen too many winters!"-- Gimli
"Or too few."-- Legolas (I almost called him Leonard, I guess I forgot what his name was).
The main characters look at Legolas with concern, as they often do when he adds haunting wisdom.
The end.
posted by HLR | February 25, 2012
2 Comments:
My older brother always says his name is Bonecrusher whenever the cashier asks. When his food is ready, they have to call out BONECRUSHER to summon this colossal Swede. Often, the receipts bear his terrifying moniker.
Hahahaha, Bonecrusher. That's awesome. I need to come up with some more epic Viking-esque names. Or something Arabic. That would be fun. Muhammad El-Beano Shitthead (come on, it's pronounced shith-heed, geez).
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