DEATH

WE MUST ACCEPT OUR MORTALITY.

From All Directions

Hello.

Is there anyone out there somewhere?

Anyone?

1) The sun's hellish death rays are just trying their hardest to melt everything in sight (yes, they can see). I'm protected, for now, inside a house, which is quite silent, and which was also recently vacuumed clean by a Roomba vacuum named Michael Myers, who generally just does his chores without being asked.

2) Oh, to be 4 billion years old like the sun! What a thrill that would be!

3) There is no number 4.

5) At Costco, there's some sort of scanners (maybe at the cash register?) that make the sound that is the exact same 3 opening notes of the Death Cab song "What Sarah Said." So every time I leave Costco, that song gets stuck in my head.

7) I visited Bristlecone Pine trees yesterday near Cedar Breaks that are apparently close to 4,000 years old. Can you believe that? No? Where is your faith?

8) I saw a bird at the Bristlecone Pine area called a Clark's Nutcracker. This was my first sighting of this bird. Did you know that this bird can store pine seeds in up to 5,000 different spots and remember them all? This is how it's able to nest and survive at such high altitudes in wintertime, where other birds don't dare to nest (they prefer to travel to the tropics). It just spends all summer and fall gathering seeds and then hiding them for the long winter. Good job Clark.

4) I understand that everyone is busy. I understand everyone has problems. I understand that many people have children. I understand that life gets going. I understand we're all grown up, or we think we are at least. I understand. I understand. I understand. I'm going to keep telling myself that, no matter how little I believe it.

14) The smell of sub-alpine forest (spruce, fir, etc) is... how shall I put this... lovely.

15) Wow, 15 of these. Impressive! Well, I must run now. No, I'm just kidding, I can't run anywhere.

Mayo

Mayo. Is it nothing more than a nasty spread you put on your gross nasty sandwiches with bologna or some such garbage meat?

O.J. Mayo. Is he nothing more than an NBA premier dunking sports superstar who was banned from the NBA for violating some drug rules or some such thing?

Truly, nothing good ever comes from mayo. Or Mayo.