Fish Tacos of Death

"Perch ye on this bed of crumbs." -- The CrumbMaster

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Location: Hell, Michigan, United States

I like birds

Monday, December 26, 2011

The "Getting to Know You" Paradox

It's interesting that when people want to get to know me, they usually ask me the same cliche questions: "Where are you going to school?" "How's school and work going?" "Where are you and Emily living?" or a bazillion other questions that all relate to "work" and "school." I think more appropriate questions are "why" questions, which involve actual thought and help reveal why people are the way they are. But then if you ask a "why" question, it seems kinda weird, like you're trying to "get to know them" or something.

Saturday, December 24, 2011

Hamburger Helped

I was thinking of writing some sort of reflection on Christmas, but that seems kind of cliche. So I don't know what I'm going to write.

1) We watched "Gremlins" today at the Berrett house. It's kinda stupid but I find it greatly entertaining. And it's a Christmas movie! Excellent! We decided that Billy's family should've dropped water on Gizmo to create another Mogwai, and then given the mean new Mogwai to the grumpy Chinese man at the end. Boy would HE HAVE BEEN IN FOR A SURPRISE!

2) I decided I don't care how everyone else celebrates Christmas. I've been through the whole angry "PUT CHRIST BACK IN CHRISTMAS" phase, but I think what my family does and what traditions I will start with my own family is the only thing that should concern me about Christmas. I know I should be up in everybody's face about Christmas and what it "really means" but...no. Who will be convinced of anything, ever? Your mom? Your dad? Your dog Fred? Your salamander Tony? I doubt it. Get out.

3) I got my grades today! It was a mess of a semester. My GPA was the worst it's ever been. I am glad though that there were no class failures. Now that I am trying to put chemistry and math on hold for a couple years, I should be all right hopefully. This paragraph lacked anything resembling interesting information. I don't care.

4) I got a shower mirror for Christmas! EXCELLENT!

5) "YUM YUM!"-- Stripe the Evil Gremlin, upon seeing the word "candy" on a store window.

6) Merry Christmas to one and all. I sleep now.

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Christmas Thoughts

I am sitting at my in-laws' house in Salem, Utah. The basement is extremely cold. I've been wearing the same American Eagle orange hoodie for about the past three days. Fortunately, I'm a rather good-smelling person by nature, so I have no problem wearing some clothing for extended periods of time. It's December 22nd. It's my brother Nick's birthday. He got married last week. Good for him and marriage. Way for everyone to get married.

WAY TO GO.

I went to the University Mall today. I walked from end to end about 5 times looking for my brother in law Spencer, thinking he had been dropped off, but actually, he hadn't. My thigh hurts from walking. It might help if I wore shoes that weren't slippers. The "Oro Gold" lady, one of those salespeople that sits at the center of the mall and tries to beleaguer everyone that walks by, approached me as I was walking and asked, "Can I ask you a question?" I rejected her quite unhesitantly, which is unusual for me because I usually give everyone a chance, even that guy that came to my house a few weeks ago and tried to sell me magical cleaning solution. I HATE salespeople at the mall. VEHEMENTLY. And I rarely use that word. I once bought Dead Sea Soap on my mission at a mall because I couldn't ever turn down people. And the stuff did NOTHING but scratch my face. Since then, I avoid mall salespeople like the black death.

We went to costco. It was neat. They had lots of samples. They also had this HUGE anatomy book. It was neat. But I already have like, three anatomy books, so get out of here. I notice that human anatomy books seem to be getting bigger and bigger.

Like I said, it's cold in the basement. Emily had surgery. She's laying on the couch incapacitated. Or sleeping. I dunno. I have a sister-in-law that thinks she's way more righteous than everyone else, but that's old news. I have a younger sister-in-law who wears the same kind of glasses as Emily. She's kind of a mini-Emily. There's three other sibling-in-laws who are all goofy but all extremely intelligent.

It's cold here. There's snow everywhere. I don't think I ever want to live here.

Oh, Merry Christmas.

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Bucky O'Hare


Does anyone remember Bucky O'Hare? That heroic space rabbit? From space? According to wikipedia, he's from Rhode Island, which is weird. I thought he was from...space.